(To my immense credit, it only took 27 years of knitting to learn to try it on BEFORE I finished the entire sweater and found out too late about the extra buddy space... Still, even with that part of the learning curve thus mastered, not quite knitting blogger material, here.)Hats should actually fit over one's head.
But perhaps not by quite so much...
I have no better luck with children's sweaters.
Ditto on the four years ago for this one (not quite sure what was up with green that year, but apparently, we liked it...), but now her arms are too long. I don't know how to flip the darn picture on Blogger, so you just flip your head, alright? (I'd suggest to the left, but you can do it however you'd like.)
(Yeah. And also? If my mom thinks I'm going to wear this disgusting crappy plastic fun furry yarn, from way back when that was sort of interesting but now just gives everyone the skeevy-jeevies, SHE'S the one smoking crack. )And then, well, there is this. Not remotely sure what happened here, but certainly, no knitting blogger worth her Addi Turbos would EVAH have considered this a wise choice of patterns, yarn, or time:
Perhaps there was some crack involved. But anyway, that is the answer to the question posed by some of you knitters.
_____________________________________________________________
Some answers to the house guest questions:
Yes. There has been more shopping.
Two more days. Two. More. Days.
Fine. Just fine. Why do you ask? Is it the permanent twitch of my right eyelid or the fact my hair is falling out in clumps? The ground-down teeth? The fact I haven't managed to keep the snarl out of my voice for the past four days? Which? Huh? Huh? Tell me. I dare ya'.
P.S. While I have no problem posting ugly-ass pix of myself wearing ugly-ass hats, this photo is causing me a bit of trouble breathing when I think about hitting the "Publish Post" button. I just want it really, really clear, that I am not a pig. Ugly, I can live with. But not pig. This is my office, which I have been missing terribly, (and now have to burn) with a cot (ditto), for the guest who didn't fit in the real guest room because, oh yeah, duh! there was already a guest in it.
And you should see the bags in there...
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35 comments:
First of all, anyone who actually finishes knitting projects is a hero in my book. Secondly, I don't know about the grey hat, but I sure am mesmerized by the background. What is that? Wallpaper? I love it.
Flibberty - Which background? The silver? In an ill-advised attempt at house-decorating, I chose some Ralph Lauren metallic silver paint for my family room. The circles? In an ill-advised attempt to mix crafting and house-decorating to fill a need for art in the bathroom, I stapled some fabric to a wooden frame. I guess we have my next blog post idea: "Why this isn't a home decor blog..." ;)
The circles. I love those colors and I love the circles. So, yes, the circles. Oh, I like other people's home decorating, but I have no interest in my own. Why is that? I like seeing other people's houses too (not in a creepy way) so feel free to throw a home decor post our way!
Hon, I am so twitching over the house guests that I didn't even notice the backgrounds. Also, I was too mesmerized by your loveliness.
It's almost done, it's almost done, it's almost done ...
Hey! You have a discernible waistline! I am sooo jealous.
You should see the first sweater I ever knit. And didn't finish. If I can ever find it, I'm ripping it apart and making something else out of it.
MadMad, you know we ALL have those projects that are stuffed in the back of our closets. Might I suggest donating them to your houseguests as gestures of good will? In fact, might I further suggest the hat you're wearing in the picture go to one particular houseguest? Hang in there; you're in the home stretch.
PS> Oh, yeah, you and the kids are adorable!
We were reading a storybook of Greek myths at bedtime last night, and in the story of Hercules' tasks there's this dude with man-eating horses, to which he FED HIS GUESTS. I immediately said, "Whoa, Rachel NEEDS one of those horses!" I swear, I did.
As for the knitting, sweetie, it's all gauge. Gauge is a bitch sometimes, is she not?
Oh, and I think you have to flip the photo before you upload it to Blogger.
I will see if I can track down a man-eating horse (or two) for you...
Ah... i agree w/Kim.. farewell gifts!
This is so funny, and I love all the pictures!
I like the circles thing, too. Mesmerizing.
Hee hee, I have hats & sweaters just like that...stuck in the back of my closet somewhere & obviously not on my blog (you are much braver than I, MadMad).
Gauge is an evil evil wench - but your knitting is gorgeous anyway. And your kids... too cute for words!!
Those pictures are exactly why I'm sticking to knitting socks and hats - you can always find someone who will fit the hat you've made. I'm leaving the sweater knitting to my mother.
Ha! Well, that was definitely worth the wait.
You simply must upload those pics to Ravelry when you get in. Maybe they'll start a Wall of Shame or something.
Seriously though, that first green sweater is lovely. As is the pirate hat(or is it hats?).
If you slip the hats and sweaters in those shopping bags, the guests can take them home and might not even realize it...In fact, any other household items you are wanting to get rid of could go into one of those bags. I would not try this with the children, someone is bound to notice a bag that talks.
Yup, Kim's onto something there - you aleady have the perfect "get the hell outta here" gifts.
As for that shopping...Holy Retail Therapy Batman!
You totally make my day, when I read your blog. I have the same problem when knitting except mine always wind up to small. The wall paper if great to. Reminds me of those pictures you stare to find the hidden picture. Keeps the eyeballs guled to it but very lovely.
Perhaps you could stuff the knitting into the mouth of whichever of Girl or Boy that is most annoying, and then stuff them into one of the guest bags and...oh wait, I've gone to far, haven't I?
ps - I also love that spotty fabric picture thing you are modelling in front of!
You are brave - love the knitting - force the houseguests to wear it - in fact get6 them drunk - make them wear it - blackmail with the pictures if they ever threaten to return - see - easy!
(PS Say with me 'the reason I love to frog is...')
You need to find some peeps with bigger heads. Cute kids.
Kids appear to be somewhat normal, but I know that they're really aliens in the shape of kids, who have been sent to torment your every waking moment. I think they DESERVE knits that don't fit ;)
Love your hat, what can I say? Gore-jeous dahhlink. LOL ;) Hope The Guests have GONE (I won't tell anyone about the wine IV or the shallow graves, honest)!
why has nobody mentioned the one thing that stood out to me in this post - your cute freckles! Bugger the decor and the ill fitting knitwear, I noticed your cute freckles!
The fact that you've kept all this evidence is what will occupy my mind for the rest of the day.
But I'm with flibberty when I say congrats on the finished objects. If you only saw my WIPs.....let's just say there's lots(and I'm not even bringing my socks into this)
I just discovered your blog - it's amazing where clicking a few links can take you. I think I found you by way of waiterrant.net - I followed a post to iambossy.com, and then followed your post here. I've been reading your older posts and have nearly blown coffee out my nose on multiple occasions.
I'm a fairly new knitter myself, and your knitting beats the hell out of anything I've done. I've started a couple of hats that were too big for even my fat head.
Oh, I hang my head in shame. As if it weren't bad enough to write in a similar style to your last post, but to actually duplicate the name. I honestly don't know if that was in my head when I wrote my last posting, but your genius may have stuck in my unconsciousness. As my son would say...I am a copy cat. Meow. So Sorry!!
Bossy can't even spell n-i-t-t-i-n-g let alone do it. Just Say Know.
Hahahaha! TOO funny! At least you can knit! I cannot knit AT ALL. I wouldn't know where to begin.
It's great to see some of your knitting, even if it is the stuff you consider to be flops! At least you can do intarsia, I haven't gotten there myself. My clothing usually turns out wonky too-- this is possibly why I make mostly toys now. That way I don't have to even think about gauge!
And those guests... Have they not left yet?! Dear God, you poor thing!
Too many comments to read, but I must say: Pig? What the hell are you talking about? Those floors are damn clean! Hell, I can see the reflection of the bags in them.
Ummm. Remember the crack whore?She'll be taking a number. I think you'll be barricading the door and wielding sticks to keep the girls away from Boy in 10 years. He's adorable, he cares not a fig for authority and he's funny. You're in trouble. Wicked.
i see it's been some time since you've posted this, and according to my calculations you couldn't possibly have done it...
but I'll ask anyways... just for the humor of it all...
if you can find it... if you can't let me apologize in advanced... or at least give this poor guy a head start at running with my tail between my legs.
Did you create the costume line up for that Pixar movie Monsters Inc.?
hey, at least you keep knitting! me, i've been trying for over a year to learn and still haven't succeeded. bravo to anyone who finishes any knitting at all! :-)
just stumbled across you from eyeblog. i'll definitely be back, by the way. :-)
/julie
After seeing your latest post and scrolling around and seeing all of the other knitting titles, I did begin to wonder what the role of knitting was in this blog. Then I found this post. It is just hilarious. I am quietly laughing in bed next to a sleeping husband, feeling a burn in my abdominal muscles from trying to suppress my laughter! Thanks for this.
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